Tuesday - Day...8ish?

Tuesday morning weigh in: 122.6 (yippe, I lost 1.2 pounds in over a week)
Calories In: I was so hungry by 8:00PM I was like a hoover. Did so well all day (and by doing well, I mean I was still STARVING) then get home at around 8:00 and started eating things I would normally not even eat. Chocolate mini easter eggs..I hate cheap plain chocolate...but I ate em. Pita bread loaded with nutella. (omg, it was so good), some peanuts, some mini M&M's (only about a TBSP cause that was all that was left). It was bad. But I counted it all and still ended the day around 1900 and change. Doesnt SOUND like the worst day ever, does it?? (Well, here's a sneak preview of tomorrow's post. I got on the scale this morning (wed morn) and weigh 124.6. So not only have I gained back the 1.2 from above...but added on to that by .8 pounds. I don't even know what to say. It just sucks so bad.)
Excercise: still a bit sore from the 30K, so I walked uphill on a 15% incline for 32 minutes. Machine said I burned 360 calories. So, 300 maybe. Then did about 10 minutes of arms and shoulders. ALMOST did a 5th chinup today but couldn't quite squeeze it in. Soon though.

I was walking out of Costco last night. THey make it so you have no choice but to walk past the food court to see everyone thouroughly enjoying their poutines and icecream cones. In order to avoid feeling sad about not being able to eat the food, I tend to take a good look at the people sitting and eating. I feel sad and frustrated when I see really thin people eating really shitty fatty bad food. I want to be able to eat it too and also be as thin as them. But then I see the other 95% of the customers. All overweight. Many of the very very overweight. When I notice that, I feel strong. I feel proud of myself for fighting the cravings and temptations often enough to avoid getting that way. As hard as it is and as much work as it is, I know the sadness and depression I feel now is NOTHING compared to how I would feel if I was carrying an extra 100 pounds around instead of this 10 or 20. I have been 50 pounds too heavy at the very very most, and that was after giving birth. So I really have no idea how hard it is to be 100 pounds overweight. I hope I never do.